alot things had been happening nowadays..
fact is i'm very very very unhappy for quite some time and stress..

fact one..
i have just been charge with 4 extra..
2is for being rude to superior
2is for losing of gun barrel
its true that its consider very good for giving such a light punishment but there are alot things which make it unfair..

this is what that happen on that day....

i had a field training on that day..
need to chiong sua and i need to take my GPMG to dismount from the tank n bash into the forest..
well my back was injured quite badly liao le and i know i could not take it..
so after hearing about the news i go to my sgt and tell him that i wanted to fall out as i could not take that pressure..but he just say no..no he wont care..he just die die want me to take it..
well i took it without saying anything else le..
when i was bashing for awhile with that MG i face change as i was in pain..guess my sgt saw it le than let other people carry it for me..
after mission end..it was about 5-6pm and i have to mount something on the MG..
at that point of time my spare barrel was with my buddy..(he had to carry it when we dismount for mission)
at that time as i was feeling very shag and in pain i was just craving for a good rest..
than my that buddy wave to me as i was mounting the thing and i thought that he was trying to tell me..(oi i go back to the training shack first hor)
but than actually he was trying to tell me that his going to put back the barrel and was telling me to put it back into the barrel box..
as i was wearing another kind of helmet i could not hear much stuff from the outside as my ear is block by that helmet..
well..so he place that barrel on top of the barrel box-.-
after that as i did not notice that he had place it at there once i finish doing my stuff i went back to the training shack and rest le..
bla bla bla end of that day.
the next day in the morning..
suddening one mother fucker!walk into the training shack and shouted out!HEY I FOUND THIS BARREL WHILE I WAS SMOCKING AT THE BUSH!
....well that attract everybody..
at that point of time i was laughing out..
i was like so lol...who the fk will lose their barrel at there sia..than when that fker read the barrel number out..it was mine........and i was laughing out like smlj?!?!?!
than my sir tell me to go to his side there...
the sgt was also at there..
and they kept saying..haha u die liao la get ready to go DB or kanna charge..something like that and it pisses me off straight to the point!
well that time my sir was just nagging about it..and so i just told him
want charge just charge la..don nd say so much le ma..no point also liao le..
and yes i was not speaking in a good manner..
well he was pissed..

OK!now why will the barrel drop?
well after investigating it for sometime asking around like one stupid idiot..
i finally know the reason le..
after i dismount from the tank
other platoon de sgt took over that tank and he drove off to pick up his man..
by right to say..if theres a change or sgt to take over the tank they should chk it 1st..well i believe they did not do that..
and another thing is..when the tank is moving and theres a MG mounted on the tank..there must be a person standing guarding the MG..well i believe that they did not do so too..
as the tank is moving due to the vibration i suspect thats when the MG barrel drop down..

k thats how its lost..

after some discussion with my session..
well i'm not the one who drawn GPMG..and the person who drawn it has agree to me that he will be ok if i said it..and they will support me to fight against the spec and above..

ok..few days ago..finally my ps give out my punishment..i told him my reason and he kanna shoot alot time by me untill he bo wei kong..than after quite some period of time he finally had his own reason..
and my buddy and me kanna extra..
i was like wtf..my buddy should'd even sign for it..
and my ps reason was..(well u both are the MG team whatever happen to the MG u all are responsible for it) and it was like so (&^%$##$%^& cas for whatever reason i tried to tell him he just say back the same old shit=.=''!!!!

for this i quite pek cek for some time le..
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case 2

donno why this few days..donno is because i'm too short or look too small size or what..-.-
people keep banging on me from behind and i'm totally piss off from it..untill yesterday..
when i'm near the store going to pick up some stores one fking cb took his stores and just bang me from behind straight all the way like his father open de road..and he still yaya walk not even saying excuse me or say sorry when he band on me..
than i was soooooo pissed of that i almost went out of my mind and i said to him
oi what is wrong with you?!
and he didd even give a fk dame..
and well my fire burn even stronger liao le
so i shouted out to him
OI CB DONT MAKE ME FKING WACK YOU!
than he reply me back..
you want you come lor..
WAAA!!!
SUPER ON FIRE LIAO !!!!
than i go up to him and i push him from his back and he dropped his stores and just when i was going to burst out liao
i titi hear one of my friend keep saying oi don like that la..something like that-.-well that point of time he titi nag..
and bo pain....i than tell myself kanna charge in DB for beating a person up really bo hua...
alot things..alot alot things that i haven do yet...
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case 3

well my grandfather just died not long..and ya..
of cause i'm not feeling good about it.
guess for this don nd explain much ba.
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case 4

my house...
well i'm living in a one room flag with my mother my bro and his gf..
and his gf consider quite problematic in a way..
well there's pros and cons..
erm..one room flag..aiyo..use imagination ba..
its irritating!
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case 5

my gf...
she's making me feel as if i'm a stick of cigarette..
when you burn it the spark than the fire come..
nice and shoick..
but when its reaching the end..
it will extinguish...
as if nothing happen le...

i'm really confuse by her...
totally..
she haven been replying much back to my sms and when she reply back its just those simple simple stuff..
and when i ask her more stuff she just wont reply liao le..
idk what had happen to her..
i tried asking her quite a number of times what had happen and telling her to share it with me and the ans i got is..no reply......
no reply no reply and no reply...
erm..what am i suppose to feel??!
i'm really very tired of alot of things liao le and yet shes been giving me more ?mark
if i knew whats happening and why shes behaving like that i guess i would feel alot better ba..
but well...haiz...


to girl...
if u need time to disgust about what you are having difficulties at least let me know..don keep me in silent..i will not know anything and i will nvr understand...
or if...you are losing feelings on me just let me know
please please please please don't make me so confuse le..
i don wanna get the wrong idea on what you are thinking..
i'm really suffering enough le...
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well this are some of the problems i'm facing now..
how can don stress??
i believe as all this keep carry on on my mind..
one day...
one day i might just go crazy or get into depression...